Words that don't want to come

I am not sure how to put this or even write about it since my mind and heart wish it weren't true. I wrote on here in June that my Dad had cancer on his tongue and that they did surgery and took it out. They thought that they had got all of it and all signs showed that they didn't need to do radiation or chemo. Well My Dad now has a lump in his throat. On Tuesday they will be removing and hope that they don't have to remove any nerves that it may be around. You just don't realize how many of our nerves veins and other things are in our neck. It all has to flow from our brain to the rest of our body through there. Three weeks after surgery they will start chemo and radiation. My mom is not handling well and my dad justs wants to start already. My Dad's birthday is on Sunday he will turn 66 not old enough for any of this. At this point I hate living in Arizona. Not that I don't like living here but it is so hard being so far away and not seeing them and being there. They are hoping they can get it all and that the chemo and radiation will do the job. The doctors are all amazed that my Dad does not smoke or chew. Of course the thoughts come of why this has to happen and what is the point but then the comfort that Heavenly Father has a plan. Don't we all just wish at times we could see the end. I have always been that I want to read a book fast so I can find the ending I wish that life could be that way. I wish I could make it easier for Mom and Dad. I wish I could take some of the pain from them and help them more than I am. I miss them.